I Never Wanted This in the First Place
by Blake Angriono
Summary: Quinn wants to show her BF Sam Beth, the baby she gave up so he won't pressure her any more. But she gets a blast from the past when he offers her just another wine cooler and assures her she is not fat... except this time, she keeps eyeing Puck.
1. Chapter One

***Disclaimer. I own none of the characters in this story. Property of Ryan Murphy.**

Chapter One

I don't know why I'm doing this. The last time I saw Beth, Rachel's mom who gave Rachel up for adoption was taking my baby Beth away from me. All I could do was stare at the stretch marks on my stomach. All I could think about was starting to rehabilitate my image so Coach Sylvester would accept me back on the Cheerios. But Sam was going to break up with me if we didn't have sex, and he was part of my image and more importantly my love life, and I had to show him the bastard baby I brought into the world so it would scare him.

I walk up to Rachel while she's gassing to Finn about filling out his date calendar more often. I think about why I let Finn think the baby was his, when it wasn't, the pain it caused him. It makes me want to snap my own neck.

"Rachel," I say in a more nasally and hateful tone than usual.

"Yeah?" she says back.

"Come with me," I say as I turn on my heels.

She turns around to Finn and gives him a one second finger and then jogs to catch up with me.

"What?"

"What's your mothers address?" I ask.

"Why?" she looks confused.

"I need to show Sam baby Beth. He keeps pressuring me into doing a little something something, and he'll break up with me unless he knows the risk."

"Wait, you want to use my bastard sister to scare him off?"

I hesitate then answer, "You mean my baby? Yes."

"Well, my mom didn't give me her address, but I know where she lives anyway."

"Tell me!" "Fine. She lives on 6478 North Indiana Road."

"If you didn't get the address from her, then how do you know?"

"I had Finn break into Carmel High and get it for me. He was almost arrested for theft and violation of privacy, but it was worth it," she says as she turns away from me, flaunting the way too high rise skirt she's wearing. Seriously, she may as well be wearing a dress.

Mr. Schuester walks in just as soon as I have the address written down in my hormones journal. Miss Pillsbury made me keep one when she found out about the pregnancy. I haven't pulled it out ever since I exploded. But I catch a glimpse of a tear drop mark on a page. It has a drawing of Finn kicking over a chair. That's when he found out from Rachel that it was Puck's kid, not his.

"All right guys, school is back in session, Christmas break is over, and it's 2011! Its also incredibly hot for January."

"Miss Sylvester is letting us go without the undershirts now!" Santana says as she slaps Brittany's hand. I catch a glimpse of her nipple and I know Finn does, too, because I see him arrive. Rachel slaps him on the face. I giggle.

"Anyway, this week I want you to sing a song about any leftover, deep seated angers you have. And I am going to demonstrate, because I'm still livid with Terri. So I will be singing Christina Perry's _Jar of Hearts_.

"But Mr. Schuester, that's a woman's song." Rachel says in the annoying tone of hers.

"I know, but it still expresses my anger, and how I'm still mad at Terri. Songs have no gender."

Rachel shrugs. Mr. Schue looks at Brad and nods. Brad starts the _Jar of Hearts_ sound and when the time comes, Mr. Schuester starts belting out.

_I know I can't take one more step towards youCause all that's waiting is regretAnd don't you know I'm not your ghost anymoreYou lost the love I loved the mostI learned to live half aliveAnd now you want me one more timeAnd who do you think you areRunning 'round leaving scarsCollecting your jar of heartsAnd tearing love apartYou're gonna catch a coldFrom the ice inside your soulSo don't come back for meWho do you think you areI hear you're asking all aroundIf I am anywhere to be foundBut I have grown too strongTo ever fall back in your armsAnd learn to live half aliveAnd now you want me one more timeAnd who do you think you areRunning 'round leaving scarsCollecting your jar of heartsAnd tearing love apartYou're gonna catch a coldFrom the ice inside your soulSo don't come back for meWho do you think you areDear, it took so long just to feel alrightRemember how to put back the light in my eyesI wish I had missed the first time that we kissedCause you broke all your promisesAnd now you're backYou don't get to get me backAnd who do you think you areRunning 'round leaving scarsCollecting your jar of heartsAnd tearing love apartYou're gonna catch a coldFrom the ice inside your soulSo don't come back for meDon't come back at allAnd who do you think you areRunning 'round leaving scarsCollecting your jar of heartsAnd tearing love apartYou're gonna catch a coldFrom the ice inside your soulDon't come back for meDon't come back at allWho do you think you are?Who do you think you are?Who do you think you are?_

When Mr. Schue is finished, I spot a tear roll down his cheek. This is not a time to critique the fact that he was sharp and this song did not fit his vocal range. Oh, God, I sound like Rachel.

"Mr. Schue, that was intense," Finn says with a dumb look on his face.

"That would be the point," Mr. Schue says as he wipes another tear away from his face.

The bell rings. Time to find a good song about teen pregnancy.

**Did you like it? Or did you hate it? Tell me in a review, I can take heat! I don't care if you're anonymous, either! Just gimme some feedback!**


	2. Chapter Two

Chapter Two

I walk out of the choir room and into the hallway. I have five minutes to get all the way across this damn school to my locker, then come all the way back. I really should take Sr. Mary Norbert's advice and carry two books at once.

As I walk to my locker, the hallways part like the Red Sea. I'm back to where I was before I got kicked off the Cheerios. This is exactly what I want. People afraid of me.

Sam emerges from another corner. I walk to him and as he sees me he smiles.

"Why weren't you at Glee?" I asked.

"I was at a dentist appointment. Yesterday I saw a black dot in the back of my teeth, and I-"

"Sam, honey, baby, my Smexican, I don't care."

"Sorry."

"I have something to do with you after Cheerios and football. I'm taking you somewhere important."

"Like a hotel so we can squeeze something in?" he says as he winks at me.

"Sam, you know my purity is very important to me."

"Baby, you ain't a virgin."

"But you are. If I get pregnant again, do you know what my mom will do to me? She'll take me right out of school and send me to a convent. Is that what you want, Sam?"

"No."

"Good. Then meet me at the Camaro at 5."

"Sounds good baby," he says as he pats my abdomen.

"Don't be late," I say over my shoulder. I have this guy right where I want him. He has no chance of getting me pregnant. At least I think so.

**Short chapter. But it's a setup, babe. Like it? Hate it? Tell me, I wanna know!**


	3. Chapter Three

Chapter Three

I was waiting at my Camaro when Sam emerged from the front doors of McKinley, sweaty from football practice.

"Hey, Sam!" I said cheerfully.

"Hey Q. So where are we going?" He said as he put his hand on the handle of the driver.

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no," I say as I slap him away. "I'm driving."

"Why?"

"Because it's a surprise," I say as I open the door and fall into the seat. Sam circles the car and hops in. He throws his football pads into the back seat.

"Great way to make a stain," I say sarcastically.

"Sorry," he mutters.

"Why are you foul?"

"I'm not. I just really wish we could have sex."

"It's not gonna happen so just get the thought out of your head," I snap.

I put the keys in the ignition then back out of the crummy parking lot. As I back out I see Santana leaning in to Brittany. I think they are going to kiss. I turn my head so I don't see.

I floor it once we get away from the damn school. I hope there are no police on the road. I would be totally screwed.

We don't talk in the car. There is a little tension but Sam needs to get over this fantasy of us having sex. I will not get pregnant again. It isn't even a possibility. My dad already disowned me. I am not legally his daughter. It's a bit hypocritical, though, considering he had an affair. But I didn't need my dad, anyway. He can eat a bullet for all I care.

No, that's not true. I love daddy and I wish I were his daughter. Legally, that is. I want to see him and have him rock me like I'm still a baby. I love mom, but there is this special bond a daughter and a daddy have. They start with the same letter, right?

"We're here," I say as I pull up to a medium sized house with a white pickup fence behind it. I see a garden, and then a girl with curly blond hair, chubby legs and a dress. Beth.

"What is this, Quinn?"

"We're here for you to see Beth," I say as I get sort of teary.

"No, Quinn, I really don't want to do this," he says as he looks me in the eye, like I'm a dog and he's the master.

"This is the only thing that will stop making you mad when I don't put out," I snap. I slam the door of the Camaro and he slams the other door.

I don't go up to the front door because I know Beth and Miss Corkrin are in the back yard. I unlatch the small picket fence and go into the yard. Sam follows.

I see Shelby look up from tying Beth's tiny little shoe.

"Ms. Corkrin!" I say as I run into her arms. She embraces me hard.

"Quinn!" I hear her whisper.

When she's finished hugging me I look down at Beth and hold my arms out. She giggle uncontrollably and then runs into my arms out of natural instinct. I start to cry my heart out, smearing my tears all over her beautiful dress. Why did I give this beautiful child up? Why am I such a selfish jerk?

Ms. Corkrin wipes tears from her eyes and then asks, "How did you get my address?"

"From Rachel."

"Oh, yeah., she's visited quite a lot. And may I ask two things?"

"Yeah."

"Why are you here and who is this boy."

"I'm here to show Sam, that's Sam, Beth."

"Ms. Corkrin," Sam says as he steps up out of the shadows like some sexual villain. "Beth is a beautiful baby. Thank you for taking care of her."

"Why are you thanking me?"

"Because I'm Quinn's boyfriend. And I want the best for her…. Family."

"Well thank you Sam. You're a gentleman. But whenever I see Beth's face, I see you, Quinn," she says as she squeezes my hand.

"I just wanted to say hi," I say as I grab Beth one last time.

"But Quinn," Ms. Corkrin says. "I don't want you to come back."

"What?" I manage to breathe.

"I don't want Beth to know until she's older that you're her biological mother. So until she's eighteen she doesn't have permission to see you. You are now not legally allowed to contact her until she's eighteen."

"That's the same contract you had with the Berry's," I say, anger building up inside of me.

"Yes, but Rachel was allowed to contact me." She says as she pushes Sam and I out the gate.

"I want a picture of her and me before we go. Is that reasonable?" I ask..

"Yes," she says after a minute of thinking. She lets me back into the yard. She takes a picture of me with Beth on my phone.

I cry and squeeze Beth in my arms one more time, until Ms. Corkrin has to tear me away and hand me over to Sam. He sets me in the passenger side and then drives us back to his house.

"Sam, I want Beth back," I say when we pull into the driveway of his house.

"Well, it's too late, now baby."

I sit in the front seat and let Sam carry me into his bedroom where he pulls me into a kiss.

"You know, Quinn, we don't have to be good and have it together all the time."

"I know," I say as I breathe a little bit.

"I want us to have a little fun tonight. It is Friday," he persuades me.

"Your lucky you have me in a depression. But I won't have sex,"

"Okay," he cringes.

"But, do you want to drink some wine?" I ask.

He hesitates. "Okay. I'll go grab us a couple glasses.

I know I shouldn't be doing this. But when I found out I couldn't see Beth is put me in a huge funk. And I feel fat after seeing her. And if things do get serious, I'm on birth control for a lighter period.

Sam returns with two glasses of wine he got no doubt from the mini fridge in his parents' room. He hands me a glass.

I want to start to drink it, but first Sam makes us toast.

"To being us," he says as we clink glasses.

I swig mine down in a gulp and I can already feel the heat setting in, the burn turning me into a nut. My head starts to spin. I shouldn't have drank, but I think I can still keep on my head so I don't make any mistakes.

"Here, have another," Sam says as he fills my glass again. He seems a little disoriented. What a virgin.

I drink the next glass and now I can't see straight. I know Sam can't either because he tries to pour himself another glass and completely misses the glass.

And then I feel a tug at my skirt. I can't resist. The fight's all out of me. And after all, this is the time to make mistakes.


	4. Chapter Four

Chapter Four

That night is over. Sam and I did it. But his words still ring in my head, "I couldn't love you any less."

That was so much better than what I did with Puck. It makes me wonder why that wasn't what it was like. That was what my first time should've been like, and oh, I shouldn't have gotten pregnant, either.

Sam turns to me and kisses me. I couldn't have asked God for a better boyfriend. Of course, he gave me one and I abused the fact I had him. Sigh.

I get up and go tot the bathroom. I am expecting to see a collection ob blood since this is the first day of my period. But there is none.

It's probably just going to start later. No big deal. This has happened before. So I put on a panty liner and call it a morning.

Today is Saturday, so I don't have to go to school, but the only thing I have to wear is my Cheerios uniform. Crap. If I go home in that Mom will know something's up. Mom will kill me if she finds out the sexual abstinence classes she made me take after the baby was born didn't work. I'm screwed.

**This was a short chapter. Sorry! And I am also sorry this wasn't the sex scene you probably all wanted, but my mom would freak if I wrote that! So review, and I think you know what's going to happen next, so beware of updates!**


	5. Chapter Five

Chapter Five

I have made up a story. My mom will think I was doing something I wasn't supposed to considering I didn't come home and I was still in my uniform.

"Sam, I have to go. I'll see you tonight around five."

"Okay. And Quinn, you're really good. And I'm glad my first time was you."

"Sam, I'm flattered, but I can't let this happen again. I'll lose my rep and there's always the chance I'll get pregnant. We can't have a baby, Sam. Not now."

Sam nods and kisses me on the forehead with his big, cool lips. I wave at him then leave his room. I swish my hips a little to get him going, because I know how much he likes my butt after last night. It hurts a little though, the fabric on my bare crotch. I am not wearing my thong because it is covered in… well, you get the picture.

I get in my Camaro and drive to my huge house on Garden Street. My mom is going to freak out, but I have a story, remember?

I pull up to the house, ready for game time. Remember the story, Quinn. Remember the story.

I walk into the house, waiting for mom to come out of her room screaming. I see her sitting on the couch on the phone.

"Yes officer, she's 5'4, blond hair, and will probably have on a red and white shirt and skirt…."

"Mom!" I yell.

Mom does a double take and then says into the receiver, "Officer, she just walked in. Thank you for the help," she hangs up. "Where the hell have you been? I was worried sick about you, you little-"

"Mother, don't overreact!" I yell. "Let me explain." Story time. "Sam and I were going to see a movie like our normal Friday and he took a wrong turn. We ended up in Cleveland, and-"

"Why didn't you call?" she demanded.

"My phone was dead and Sam left his in his locker. We got a hotel room, with two separate beds and slept there for the night. We got up as early as we could and we drove back in the daylight. I'm sorry."

"Oh. I'm sorry, I was just so worried and I didn't want anything to happen to my baby," she said as she pulled me into a fierce Fabray hug.

"You said your prayers, didn't you?" she asked.

"Yes, mom," I lied.

"Sam didn't pressure you, did he?" "No! He's a perfect gentlemen," I lied again.

"That's what you said last time. I don't trust you,"

"Mom!" I yell.

"You're getting worked up. I think your lying," she says.

"No mom, I'm not."

"Prove it," she demands. I can't believe I'm hearing this.

"What do you want me to do to prove it?"

Mom stands there and thinks for a couple seconds. She leaves and goes into the bathroom and comes back with a pregnancy test.

"Use this."

"What?" I ask. "I am not pregnant!"

"Then you have nothing to be afraid of," Mom whispers. I snatch the pregnancy test out of her hand and take it into the bathroom with me.

I yank down my pants and stare at my panty liner, thinking that the blood will be there. No dice.

I start to panic. What if I actually am pregnant? Mom will kick me out again for sure. But this has happened before. I regain my cool.

I know what to do with the pregnancy test because I did it once before. I pee in the little cup that comes with it and then stick the test in it and wait for two minutes. When the test beeps I pull it out and look in it. I stare at the dark word on the screen. Pregnant.

My eyes widen. That was not possible- I had birth control, Sam wore a condom- but yesterday was the day before my period. And that means I was the chanciest at getting pregnant.

Oh, shit. This can not be happening. Not again. I just got my image back, my reputation, hell, my body. I couldn't have another bastard child. I am a slut. I ignored the names before but this time I am.

I start to cry softly. Mom calls me out because she says it should've worked by now. I pull up my skirt then go outside. I try to hide my crying unsuccessfully. I hand the test to Mom and then see the look on her face. Pure rage.

"You little whore!" She scream. "Give me that skirt, that shirt and that damn bra!"

"Why?" I cry.

"Because you never wear them, anyway! Now!"

I strip completely naked and throw the clothes at my mom. This was getting scary. Mom was mad at the last time but this time? She was livid.

"I want you out of this house. Never come back. You don't have time to pack this time, missy! Take the keys to your Cheerios car and go."

I grab my keys out of the pocket of my skirt and then run out the door, completely naked.

I drive to Sam's house, tears filling my eyes the whole way. I try to hide my breasts with my hair, but people see. I see Carousky walking to the sports store and he spots me in my car. He starts patting his pecks, pointing at my breasts. I want to die, but I just keep my head high and don't say a word.

When I get to Sam's I look to make sure no one is coming and then I sprint to Sam's door. I bang on it for a while and then Sam comes to the door.

"Quinn!" he exclaims as he pulls me in. "Why are you-"

"I'm pregnant," I say with a blank expression.

"And why are you also naked?"

"My mom kicked me out and said I didn't need my clothes anyway. I have nothing! She says she never wants to see me again!" I cry into his shoulder.

"It'll be okay,"

"NO it won't!"

"Yes it will!" he persuades me as I cry.

I love that boy.


	6. Chapter Six

Chapter Six

**I haven't been getting a lot of reviews, so here's a hint- No reviews=No update. Reviews=Update.**

I am moved into Sam's as quick as I was kicked out of my moms. Sam's parents were totally cool about it when we broke the news to them

So they have decided I need some parents right now. I have to live by their rules, but they are providing me with a cell phone, iPod, laptop, and a room with full wardrobe. I'll have to keep my job at Breadsticks and I am responsible for paying the bills for my car. But I had to do all that stuff anyway, so it isn't that big of an adjustment.

"Q, let's go shop with the 10,000 dollars my parents gave us to blow."

"Okay, baby."

I walk over to Sam. He picks me up and carries me to his run down old truck. Maybe he couldn't afford the nicest car, but he's my baby, right?

"Sammy, why are your parents being so nice to me? I though they would be so uncool with it."

"My mom isn't a bitch. No offense. And dad just nods with what mom says."

"I owe them too much to blow all their money."

"They want to do this, Quinn. And if you have money left over from Breadsticks, then you can give em a little of it. But don't expect them to want a form of pay."

"You know if the roles were reversed, my mom would be a bitch to you, don't you?"

"Yeah."

We don't talk the rest of the ride to the mall. I don't want to buy all of this stuff with Sam's parents money, but I have no other option. The only reason I need real clothes is for weekends, though. I wear my uniform to school every day.

We pull up to the mall. Sam escorts me out as if I am going to go into labor right here and now. But I know he's worked up about the father stuff.

There's kind of a problem about this whole thing, though. I have eyes for Puck. And I couldn't think of any teen pregnancy songs, either. And I kind of resent Puck for dumping me as soon as my stomach was normal again.

I walk into the mall and see a clothing store that has clothes from designers at half the retail price. And it's a half price sale today. So that would make most of this stuff 25 dollars.

"Let's go in there," I tell Sam. He nods and follows me into the store.

I see a beautiful pink lace shirt that is so pretty. It has a bow for a bustline and it has a little bra in it.

I pick it up and check the size and price. It's 20 dollars, and it's my size, small.

I hold it up to show Sam and I strike a sexy pose. He laughs and gives me a thumbs up. I give it to him to hold on to.

Next I see a white knit shirt with buttons up the front. 25 dollars, small. I hand it to Sam.

I pick out three more 25 dollar shirts- a turquoise one with a black belt, a long sleeve one with the words "Hello, mister." across the front and a spandex black shirt.

On to pants. Three skin tight jeans in different shades, jeggings, leggings, and then a pair of black slacks.

I get one pair of short shorts and three skirts, all pink.

I buy one short dress that is completely white but sort of see through. I want to seem sexy for the time being. I will never get my reputation back after this, and I just want some guys to feel like they can't touch this, even though they think they can.

I buy a pair of red and white tennis shoes, and a pair of black ballet flats.

The next part of this trip is sort of embarrassing. Sam knows I need underwear and bras, but it's embarrassing for him to have to help me find my size. I'm insecure about my chest because it is too damn small, and I have no hips whatsoever.

"Okay, Sam, for this part I want you to just go to the food court and get me a smoothie. I really want one."

"Okay, but I have to pay for the clothes-"

"Let me take them," I say, ripping the clothes from his arms. I shoo him away.

I take a look at what I have to choose from. A lot. So I go with a black lacy sports bra to wear to the Cheerios and for the rest of the time, an nice push up bra.

In the underwear I pick out one little thong and then 10 pairs of boy shorts. Coach Sylvester makes us wear boy shorts because she says that thongs cause us to get rashes on our butts, and she can't have inflamed butts being shown to the judges. Oh, she is a trip.

I take all the clothes and pay for them at the counter and then I go to find Sam at the food court. On my way down, I can't help but notice the maternity store. I will be forced to shop there if this little bastard is as fastly developing as Beth.

I keep on walking. No need to look at my future right now. I go to the food court and I see Sam sitting at a table with red, wet eyes. The table is so wet from where he must have been resting his head.

I sit down next to him. He meets my eyes. Seeing him like this, so upset, so in a funk, it breaks my heart. Three seconds after he meets my eyes I start to burst into tears.

"Quinn, what is it?" Sam asks as he inhales through his nose.

The realization that I have another baby on the way finally kicks in. "I never wanted this in the first place."

**Sorry it took so long to update. And As you saw before, reviews get you and update. No reviews does not. So, what do you think? Tell me in a review, I can take heat!**


	7. Chapter Seven

Chapter Seven

Sam and I are in his bedroom making out. After our episodes at the mall, we decided to forget about the baby for a while. I have 9 months of my youth left. Of course, that's what Rachel what's-her-name said last time.

_Last time._

I remember when Puck and I did it. We had been at a big party, and after everyone had left, I pulled him up to my bedroom to lightly make out. I never meant to do it with Puck, to hurt anyone. But anyway, he offered me some coolers of wine. I accepted. I didn't know what I was doing before it was over. But Puck got me pregnant. And that's that.

I break away from Sam. My hearts not in this session. I know we agreed not to talk about the baby, but I had to. It was my right, considering I was the one who was going to birth it, push a watermelon out of a place that should never be mentioned.

"Sam,"

"Yeah?"

"When are you going to take me in for a sonogram?"

"We agreed no to-"

"You're not the one who's going to have to push a watermelon out of your wrong canals!"

"Quinn, you know what this feels like. I have no idea!"

"You're right. It's too early in this pregnancy to start worrying about the doctors bills, the new clothes, my rep being destroyed-"

"Quinn?"

"Yeah?"

"You know I'll stick by you no matter what."

"That's what Finn said, but then he threw a chair across the room and quit Glee!"

"You also lied and said it was his, when it wasn't. Even if it wasn't mine, I would stick by you."

I smile. It was Sam's this time, but it still made me feel good that Sam was what Finn wasn't, what Finn would never be.


End file.
